Are You Ready For Some Ineptitude?

C’mon and get ready…
Are you ready for some ineptitude?
It’s a Monday night slopfest!
The whole house is laughin’, let’s get the debacle started.
Head to the Linc, boo the coach, that’s right,
The Walrus’ last place friends are here on Monday night!

Yes Fire The Walrus Nation, that’s right… It’s Monday! Hope you had a wonderful, Walrus-free Thanksgiving holiday! We’re positive that your front yard turkey day game with friends and family(*) featured better coaching and execution than Andy’s team – and we all know that your 7-year old niece tackles better than Kurt Coleman – but it’s time to get back to ugly, painful Eagles football.

(*)Does your uncle insist on playing steady QB too?

Can the Birds halt their six-game nosedive into patheticness? Will the Eagles rollover for the Panthers in order to secure a top-five draft pick? Is the Defense capable of stopping a Quarterback who’s been the league’s biggest disappointment in 2012? Probably not, hopefully and doubtful.

While we search for hand warmers and prepare our “Fire Andy” chants for tonight’s game, we direct your attention to two articles on that deserve your attention. The first comes from the Godfather of football writers, Ray Didinger, who takes Andy Reid to task for considering using Michael Vick again this season and charges Jeffrey Lurie with holding Reid accountable for the inevitable mistake that will be. Classic R-Diddy!

The second piece, is much more damning. Reuben Frank details some eye-opening statistics proving that the Eagles Secondary may go down as one of the worst ever… Not just in team history, but in the history of the entire NFL! The impetus behind Frank’s piece came from our good old aforementioned friend, Kurt Coleman, who LITERALLY made the following statement to people holding recording devices: “It’s frustrating, because we have what I feel is the best back end group in the National Football League.” Ladies and gentleman, Louis C.K. Kurt Coleman!

Here’s a small sampling of Frank’s brilliant retort to joke-maker/insane-person Coleman:

If that’s the case, the best secondary in the NFL has allowed 13 touchdown passes while intercepting just one pass during the Eagles’ current six-game losing streak.

If that’s the case, the best secondary in the NFL is the first in NFL history to allow four straight quarterbacks to complete 70 percent of their passes and throw for two or more touchdowns without being intercepted once.

If that’s the case, the best secondary in the NFL is now the first in 28 years to yield a passer rating of 120 or higher … four times in a row.

Good times!

Also, former-Eagles/fan favorite Hugh Douglas announced today that the team has officially quit on Andy! Sure, it’s not news, but it’s always nice to have our analysis confirmed by people who actually know things. So, there’s that.

C’mon and get ready… Reid! Rivera! It’s Monday Night Football Shitty Coaching on ESPN! Let the battle for worst team in the NFC begin!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: